Is it possible to walk away from religion, deconstruct your entire faith, start over at the beginning, and end up with any faith at all?
Sometimes I have this uneasy, very distressing feeling, that the atheists are right....
I don't like that feeling. At all.
3 comments:
At some point, if you are really listening to the Holy One, you have to do your own defining of truth about the Mystery we call God. This sometimes means you no longer practice with the same regularity, the observances of the past, but make up your own way. We are living in a liminal (in between) time. 21 years ago I started our study center because so many women were where you are today. It takes real courage to do your own thinking. In about 6 months I will move the study center back to Portland and will be opening a small urban retreat center. You are welcome to come visit and have an experience there. Many women are where you are now. It would be good to connect with them so you don't feel alone.
I'm not sure how I feel about that last comment. I used to think I was an atheist but now I think agnostic might be more appropriate, I'd prefer not to have any labels at all. What I didn't like about the label of atheist was that meant without a doubt I didn't believe in any sort of god. I don't think that's true. With all of the wonderful things in this world, I'm very open to the possibility to the existence of a higher power - I just don't choose to rely on them like so many people do. I don't want to blame all of the bad things on some god, I don't need to have a scapegoat. I'm perfectly fine with believing that it's either humans fault, whether intentional or not, or just....fate? I'm not sure. I also don't want to have to rely on praying to someone or something I've never seen or heard from. To me that feels like a weakness. If you want something to happen, you need to go out and make it happen for yourself. Praying isn't going to get you that job or that new house or a child or whatever it is you want. Praying also isn't going to magically make you a happy, peaceful person (not to say that praying doesn't bring a sense of peace to some people). These are things you can do on your own. You can make yourself happy and at peace by just making the decision. It can be really hard, but it can be done, and you can't rely on some invisible force. I don't want to knock this god figure but I also don't want to spend time worshiping him/her/it. I'd rather spend my time "worshiping" the good things in life, like love, family, a beautiful sunset, worship them by enjoying them as much as I can, not by locking myself in a building and repeating words some old guy wrote thousands of years ago. This is my favorite saying I've ever found in relation to religion... "On the first day, Man created God". I think that's very true.
Sorry if you wanted this to be all private and sneaky, but I just had to come in with my own opinion. :)
i do believe it is possible to do that.. I am a seeker.. I search religions and faiths and take a bit of this and that and tuck it into my soul... and then I seek again...each time, I come to a level place where I feel at peace and then I seek again.. but deep at my core, I do believe in God..
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